We have to stop meeting like this

You've heard it before: The more things change, the more things stay the same. Consider how we communicate and how we meet.

The way we communicate with each other has changed dramatically in the three plus decades of my professional life. There are times when we can't communicate face to face, either one on one or in a meeting. We've gone from the speed of a written letter or a Ma Bell telephone call or a fax to the lightning speed of cell phones, text messages, and e-mails. We can, if we wish, choose to be connected to each other seven days a week, 24 hours a day.

You don't have to just reach out and touch someone any more to communicate; you can reach out and grab them by the throat.

The way we meet face to face in groups, however, hasn't changed a bit. I have a long professional life -- some 33 years, most of them as a manager -- on which to base this judgment that most meetings in an office setting aren't very productive.

My daughter as a fourth grader in 1994 saw this when she came to the office as part of Bring Our Daughters to Work Day. I was a newspaper editor in Massachusetts at the time and her day with Dad, besides watching the afternoon paper get made up and spending time in the darkroom with my chief photographer, included three meetings -- one on a redesign of the newspaper, one on customer service, and one on a capital improvement plan at our local YMCA.

I had her write a story about her Work Day experience, and she concluded: "I wouldn't want to work there because they have very busy mornings, lots of computer work, lots of boring meetings, and a confusing job." I guess damaging her young psyche about meetings was enough to drive her to medicine and a doctorate degree this month in physical therapy. Smart move, kiddo.

Meetings that aren't structured or chaired well tend to meander and an hour or two later you wonder just what had been accomplished.

What's happened lately is that people, knowing meetings tend to wander, are bringing their cell phones -- their BlackBerrys and the like especially -- into the sessions. As a result meetings that were unproductive before have become even less productive.

You folks know who you are: You bring your BlackBerry to a meeting and, when the discussion flags just a bit, you pull out your phone under the table and start to read and respond to e-mails. (How many of them, even though they look like they're doing their e-mail, are actually playing the BrickBreaker game on their BlackBerry to pass the time?)

So it was interesting to me when I read recently about a New York law firm that banned BlackBerry and cell phone use during certain meetings. A managing partner of the law firm was quoted in a recent Wall Street Journal as saying: "BlackBerrys and cell phones were tremendously distracting. The meetings we have go much faster now." He suspects that participants focus on getting through the meeting more quickly so that they can get back to their phones and their instant access.

It's even become an issue in the classroom. I've talked to some educators who say that, despite a cell phone ban in most classes, high school and college kids are bringing their phones into class and texting and e-mailing away while the business of education is going on. How much you want to bet they'll bring those habits right into the meeting room of their first job?

Pretty soon, no one will be paying attention to anything anyone says in a meeting. You'll have to e-mail or text it to be heard.